An Ode to Bad Managers
Why they exist, why they're inevitable, and how you can survive them
Welcome to Frank Takeaways. I'm Frank, writing the notes worth keeping from decades at companies like Slack, Etsy, and Google. I run a coaching practice dedicated to guiding leaders through the tricky stuff of building products and high-performing teams.
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Bad managers turn simple requests into bureaucratic nightmares, hoard information, and vanish from meetings only to resurface when credit is due. They dismiss thoughtful proposals with "Let's take this offline" and make inexplicable decisions that leave you questioning your sanity.
Bad management is like the weather — unpredictable, sometimes disastrous, and mostly out of your control. Some managers rain chaos. Others bring the heat but no direction. And every now and then, you get one who's a perfect climate for growth. But don't be an orchid: the professional who can only thrive under ideal conditions.
The Accidental Manager Factory
Many companies promote high performers without adequate training, assuming execution excellence equals leadership excellence. The result? The 'accidental manager': not bad on purpose, just unsupported and unprepared.
The recipe is simple:
Take one high-performing individual contributor
Add a dash of organizational necessity
Promote them without training
Season with impossible expectations
Garnish with no support system
Cost-cutting makes it worse: expanding manager-to-employee ratios leaves unprepared leaders drowning. A no-win scenario.
The numbers are staggering: 91.3% of managers report receiving little to no formal training before taking on leadership responsibilities. Even more concerning, 59% of those managing small teams receive no training whatsoever. When the success recipe starts with "promote without training," it's no wonder we're experiencing a leadership drought.
It's like promoting a violinist to conductor — technical skill doesn't translate to leadership ability.
Scared Humans in Expensive Clothes
If you're frustrated with your boss, here's the hard truth: they're probably frustrated too. Namaste.
Most bad managers are just scared humans in slightly more expensive clothes. That director who can't make a decision? Drowning in impostor syndrome. That VP who changes direction every week? Feeling pressure you can't see.
The most successful professionals don't just endure difficult managers — they strategically adapt while preserving their own growth trajectory.
The Art of Managing Up
When you start complaining about your manager, you've hit the limits of your own ability to manage up. That frustration isn’t just about their shortcomings — it's the edge of your own influence skills.
But there's good news hidden here. Bad managers, or I might call them "not right for you right now" managers, can be your greatest teachers if you choose to learn from them. And with some strategic adaptation, you can expand that influence. Not in a manipulative way, but in a mutually beneficial partnership that serves you both.
Think of it like learning to cook by watching kitchen disasters: you'll know what to avoid. Every micromanagement moment becomes a masterclass in trust-building. Every poor communication example transforms into a lesson in clarity.
Create Structure Where None Exists
If your manager struggles with organization you can solve it:
Send agenda suggestions before meetings
Follow up with action item summaries
Create tracking systems that make both of you look good
I once had a manager who couldn't remember what we discussed from week to week. Instead of getting frustrated, I started sending brief summaries after our one-on-ones: "Based on our conversation, I'll focus on X, Y, and Z this week. I'll need your input on A by Thursday." Suddenly, we were aligned – not because she changed, but because I filled the gap.
Translate Your Work into Their Language
Bad managers often don't understand what you do, which leads them to either micromanage or disappear entirely. Help them understand:
Connect your work to metrics they care about
Translate technical concepts into business outcomes
Share progress in terms that matter to them
Ask them what's their preferred way to learn new information
When I worked in product design, my manager cared exclusively about deadlines, not quality. Rather than fight this, I started framing quality issues as schedule risks: "If we rush this design phase, we're likely to face three extra weeks of engineering revisions later." Suddenly, he became an advocate for thoughtful work.
Make Them Look Good (Strategically)
All managers have goals. Help them succeed:
Identify their priorities (often different from what they say)
Deliver wins they can showcase
Anticipate questions from above
This isn't about flattery – it's about aligning incentives. When your work makes them successful, they'll naturally give you more support and freedom.
Create Safe Learning Opportunities
Remember, most bad managers never learned how to manage. Create opportunities to practice:
Ask for feedback in specific areas
Invite their input early in processes
Acknowledge when their guidance helps
One of my most improved managers started changing after I asked him: "When you managed other teams through this situation, what worked well?" This question assumed competence he didn't have yet, but it gave him space to think like a true manager rather than just react.
Adapt or Stagnate
When faced with challenging management, you have a choice: adapt strategically or remain passive.
Without strategic adaptation:
Your productivity and satisfaction suffer
Work stress follows you home, affecting relationships and well-being
Career progress stalls in cycles of frustration
You focus on survival, not growth
With the approaches we've discussed:
You create structure that benefits both you and your manager
You turn challenges into opportunities
You build influence regardless of organizational limitations
You develop skills that transfer to future roles
If you lead other managers, your response has a multiplier effect: you shield your managers while modeling adaptability.
Dancing in the Rain: Your Choice Matters
Bad managers are inevitable, but unlike weather, you're not limited to just enduring. Those who thrive aren't luckier — they're deliberate. The strategies above are your professional climate control system.
Here's another uncomfortable truth worth considering: if you plan to lead others someday, you'll almost certainly be someone's bad manager before you become a great one. Research shows that leadership skills develop through experience and reflection, not just intent. Treating today's difficult managers with empathy prepares you for when others will need to manage up with you.
Sometimes a manager is truly toxic. If you're developing unhealthy coping mechanisms or facing ethical concerns, it's time to leave. As research indicates, up to 75% of employees who quit their jobs do so because of their manager, not the company.
Every minute you spend cataloging your manager's failures is a minute you're not spending on building yourself. You can invest your energy in building a case against them, or in building your resilience.
The next time you catch yourself cataloging your manager's failings, pause and ask: "How can I improve my situation?"
Difficult managers are inevitable, but being unprepared for them is a choice. What you do next determines whether you stagnate — or thrive.